I’m Scared

It’s 4:15 AM and I’ve been up with Annie Bea for two hours. She’s scared of everything. I started out sympathetic and sweet.

Annie Bea: Mommy! I’m scared!
I scramble out of bed to her side.
Me: It’s ok. Nothing to be scared of. I’ll tuck you in and rub your belly.
I leave. Two seconds later…
Annie Bea: Mommy, I’m scared!
Back to her room.
Me: What are you scared of?
Annie Bea: My closet.
Me: Ok, I’ll check it out. Ok, nothing in your closet except a week’s worth of dirty laundry!
Annie Bea: I’m afraid of the laundry!
Me: So am I.
Note to self: This is no time for jokes. Now Annie Bea is literally terrified of laundry.
I remove the laundry from the room.
Annie Bea: I’m scared of the pink pillow.
Pink pillow out.
Annie Bea: I’m scared of the light.
Light off.
Annie Bea: No! I’m scared of the dark!
Light on.
Annie Bea: I’m scared of my mosquito bites.
Me: Oh well let me grab my scalpel and carve them out of your leg.
(Obviously, I didn’t say that. Then she’d be scared of scalpels.)
I wanted to say, “You know what I’m scared of? You waking up Grady! I’m scared he will be overtired for school tomorrow and I’ll get a call from the teacher. I’m scared that now I’m going to be too tired to go to the gym in the morning. I’m scared that my back is going to break into spasms because now Hammy has leaped up with us in your twin-sized princess bed because guess what? A thunder storm just started and (you guessed it) he’s scared.”
I’m lying here in bed with Annie Bea whining herself to sleep, Hammy shaking like a leaf and a bright light shining in my face. But at least I don’t have that pink pillow or any laundry around to spook me out.
When, God? When will I sleep normally again? It’s been years. Years! And I have to say, I’m getting a little scared.

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