Hurricane Irma is on her way. So we left Miami to hunker down and drink out, I mean wait out the storm in Orlando. Meanwhile, the kids are finding new ways to entertain themselves before the wind and rain keep…
Category: The Ham Sandwich
Missing: Ham
Every Wednesday the pool boy comes. (Don’t get excited, ladies. Our pool boy is overweight with an underbite and wears shockingly tiny shoes.) He makes our pool sparkle and then he leaves. But last Wednesday he forgot to close the…
Pain in the Neck
Kids are a pain in the ass. But my real problem is the pain in my neck. Every parent knows that tightness between the shoulders from pushing a stroller and a shopping cart and a swing and a tricycle. We’ve…
Dr. Ham Sandwich Levine
As parents of humans, we often take our canine children for granted. The ones who don’t talk back, who don’t ask for anything but the occasional treat, who love us so much that their bodies shake when we walk through…
Get Out of My Bed!
I wake up every morning with two kids, a dog and a Jason slowly pushing me off the last square inch of my king-size bed. But the thing is, none of them come to the bed solo. Grady brings two…
I’m Scared
It’s 4:15 AM and I’ve been up with Annie Bea for two hours. She’s scared of everything. I started out sympathetic and sweet. Annie Bea: Mommy! I’m scared! I scramble out of bed to her side. Me: It’s ok. Nothing…
A Kid’s Best Friend
Hammy is the best. Grady and Annie Bea, you are so lucky to be growing up with the world’s most patient dog. He’s also lucky to be growing up with the world’s messiest eaters.
I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter
I made a wonderful dinner tonight. Chicken pot pie. Steamed broccoli. Cucumber salad. And wine, of course. We said grace. We laughed. We ate. We were a happy (perfect) family enjoying a lovely Sunday evening at home. When I got…
Hambone
Annie Bea doesn’t like to do anything the way you expect her to do it. You want her to put her arms through the shirt sleeves first? She insists on putting her head through first. You want her to drink…
Inside Out
Have you seen Inside Out? It’s awesome. A movie about our emotions and memories and every little detail that wires our brains and makes us who we are. This morning, as I was getting ready for work, Grady assigned me…