Sometimes You Just Gotta Scratch

There I am. Waiting for a table at our local breakfast joint. I’ve got Grady, a diaper bag, my purse and… an itch on my right butt cheek. So I scratch it. Right there in public. People are standing behind…

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I Didn’t See Anything

Have you ever pretended not to see your baby pee on the changing pad cover because you’re too tired to do another load of laundry so you just let it dry and convince yourself that the entire situation isn’t disgusting…

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That Will Never Be Me

I have nothing in common with this woman. Except that I stay at home, cook, do laundry, clean, make bottles and burp a baby. Other than that… we are like oil and water. I’ll bet you a million dollars she…

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Everyone Go To Sleep

Sometimes I am so tired that I look around at people and wonder, why aren’t you all at home sleeping in your warm, comfy beds? Like the old lady out for an afternoon stroll. I think to myself, “What’s your…

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Advice

My advice to all moms is to not listen to everyone’s advice. While I know people mean well and they’re all just trying to help, I have to say… I truly believe that a mother just knows what her baby…

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Longest Show on Earth

When you have a baby a 60 minute show can last anywhere from 60 minutes (you should be so lucky) to two days. I turned on an episode of Boardwalk Empire this morning at 8 am. It’s been 8 hours…

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Looking Good, Mama

A brilliant quote from another mom that I just had to share. “So today I put some make up on and thought, ‘Hey, nice to see you again.’ Then I found some granola in my bra.”

Jealousy

Is it normal to be jealous of a two and a half month old baby? I look at him in the swing and think, “If I could just lose enough weight to fit in that thing, I would have the…

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Talking in Fear

My phone conversations suck. I live in fear. I have to whisper or speak in a monotone voice so not to wake or startle Grady. Because if Grady wakes up, the phone conversation is over. Sometimes I feel like those…

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