Sorry, Not Sorry

When I bump into someone, I say, “I’m sorry.” Even if that someone was technically the real bumper. If I interrupt a blowhard in one of my meetings, I apologize. Even though that blowhard was probably due for an interruption,…

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OMFG

While playing a sweet, innocent game of chess with my son tonight, I answered a text message. (Don’t judge me. It was a text about happy hour. You would’ve done the same thing.) Anyway, obviously frustrated, Grady started complaining that…

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My Type

I never thought I had a “type” but after seven years of dating and a decade of marriage, I think it’s safe to say Jason is my type. What type is that? Jason is the type of guy who doesn’t…

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Dear Meredith Vieira’s Mom

Dear Meredith Vieira’s Mom, I don’t know if this is a true story. But in my mind it is very real. I believe one day years ago, I heard your daughter, Meredith, tell the world something you taught her. It…

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Armadillos and Coconuts

Coming home from the gym one morning, I found an armadillo crossing the street in front of our house. An armadillo! Not something you see every day. So, I ran inside to tell my family the exciting discovery I’d just…

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To Kindergarten or Not to Kindergarten

In September 1983, I was 5-years-old. So I went to kindergarten. (Shout out to Mrs. DeRiso from St. Margaret’s Catholic School in Little Ferry, NJ.) My parents didn’t question whether I was ready. It never dawned on them that maybe…

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Jerks Don’t Get Lice

I never had lice as a child. But as an adult? Twice. And both times I got it from my son. I got it from snuggling up close and reading to him. From loving and hugging him. From brushing his…

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Wrong Playdate

I love my husband but he does not have an eye for details. He once wore a mismatched pair of flips flops for three weeks – one of the flip flops wasn’t even his and it was two sizes too…

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Did You Lock the Door?

Have you ever walked in on your parents having sex? The door swung open and there he was. And there we were. And there it was. Daddy’s ass. Grady: What on EARTH is going on in here? I just got…

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