Order Up

If there’s one thing my dad and I have in common, it’s that we can’t resist paying for everyone. I got us another round. Put your money away. I already paid. It’s been taken care of. You can pay next…

Continue Reading

Llaman

Living in Miami can be very challenging for those of us who don’t speak Spanish. For example, I need to register Annie Bea for kindergarten in the fall but I also need to fill out forms to have her transferred…

Continue Reading

Whoa, Girls.

Annie Bea: Mom, what is a bra? Ugh, this is one of those questions that I obviously know the answer to but I for some reason I can’t put it into words. Me: It’s like… A bra is like something…

Continue Reading

OctoMom

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know the OctoMom is that woman who had eight babies at once. But I’d like to present you with a new OctoMom. Me. Actually, all of us parents are OctoMoms because at any given moment we…

Continue Reading

The Tent Mahal

A couple of weeks ago we did what some might call “light camping.” It was a campout at Annie Bea’s preschool. We roasted marshmallows, told campfire stories (inside the preschool hall on a nap time rug) and slept in a…

Continue Reading

School Socks

The other day I told Grady that I put new school socks in his drawer. As you can imagine, he was super excited. The next morning, he waltzed out with his backpack and lunch box, calling over his shoulder, “Bye,…

Continue Reading

XOXO

“Don’t be rude. Give your uncle a hug.” “Get back here and give Mr. Whatever a kiss.” “Did you say thank you and give Miss Lady a hug?” “Go give everyone a kiss and a hug goodnight.” I can still…

Continue Reading

Rat Bastard

There is a rat in my house. I haven’t slept in 84 hours. I haven’t stepped foot in the kitchen, either. I’ve been crying. I’ve been shaking. I have come undone. I’m terrified, horrified and mortified. In that order. First…

Continue Reading

Dear Teachers,

It’s been five days since a 19-year-old boy went on a shooting spree at a high school here in Florida. I’m tired. I’m sad. I’m sick. I’m heartbroken. And I’m torn. On one hand, I want to say the words…

Continue Reading